Kym Lambert...or Saigh (saigh_allaidh) wrote in out_hedge,
Kym Lambert...or Saigh

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gifts and service

I feel a little funny talking about this, which is why I've hesitated for awhile (okay, there was also the Mercury Retrograde). I guess it's because the internet sort of teaches us that it's okay to share bad stuff but not okay to share the good. It feels like bragging. After all if everyone else is complaining good news might make them feel bad. But then I can hardly use this to say my life has been blessed, those who know me know that there has been a huge amount of suck this year. And I'm not sure this is a blessing. I think really it's an assignment.

An Morrígan has set some stuff before me recently. I want to share partially because I feel it's required, really, to let others know that a gift has been received from one of Them. That's part of it. But also because I'm interested in others who might have felt this, that the God/dess(es) they serve interact in day to day life. In that which is "mundane." And to discuss the issue of things given with expectation.

I have been working for several years as a reporter, a job I had loved but was burned out on of late. It also doesn't pay well, not as a contract (or "stringer") worker on a weekly. It also took up much time and energy that I then couldn't give to two writing projects that I've had simmering since college (15 years!). With recent family events, I also found myself faced with the possibility of being homeless...well, at least without the home I have now. Land I am deeply bonded with.

The economy here sucks. No other word for it. So my mate and I were hunting for better jobs to no avail (his at least was full-time and paid somewhat better, but he's still looking for something better). Right at this time a nightwatch job opened up at a local residential educational camp for "troubled boys." One which I had done a story on about two months before.

Now, see I have this whole Outsider, in the Fianna sense, thing going on spiritually. Can anyone think of a job more evocative of the Fianna than this? Oh, maybe counselor here...but, still!

Much offering was made. To Her in particular. But it didn't look good. The interview seemed horrible and seemed focused on why the hells the reporter who did a story would want the job. And a lot of "we really got a lot of great applications." He never called back that week, not even the promised call to everyone to let us know either way.

Two weeks later, I was called and he asked if I was still interested. They had hired someone, but finally decided they needed to hire a second. Given how unlikely it seemed, the feeling that I am supposed to be here was really brought home.

More offerings, but not as many...frankly I am finding it harder to schedule us to do this sort of thing right now. But Samhuinn was pretty intense! Even though I came to work shortly after that night.

I do consider the job itself mostly quasi-warrior. I mean, this is the sort of job that wannabee cops get, you know. It could be embarrassing if I made too much of that aspect. The location is, however, back to that whole Outsider thing. Ironically enough, I am very much a professional fire-tender (not in a Brìde priestess flame-tender sense, but the sort of tribal ritual role I used to do before my married days and still do for our own hearth) too, at least for the next few months (this is a CAMP, these boys are in platform tents heated with wood all winter, someone has to keep those going at night).

And THIS job here means that I can write. MY stuff. Okay, that will go better once I totally quit the paper, which I'm working on (the problem of working for friends, "we have no one to do this and it won't be done if you don't and if we don't have it they'll be egg on our collective face").

I truly feel that She has much to do with why I'm here. Both because she is making it possible for me to finally do something that is path related. I also won't go into the health issues that are involved, up until a short time ago I couldn't have even dreamed about holding down a job like this, but that has changed over the past year...something that I feared would always keep me from working a job that was path related.

I also feel I have an assignment now. I have time to write. I am feeling compelled to work on the women warrior project that I had back burnered in favor of a CR one. But with the CR FAQ finished I feel that much of what I felt I needed to get that out there for is covered. And broader than I would have done. That will come, perhaps even more specific than it would have been, as CR grows.

This job also allows me to get my personal trainer certification back (I make enough money now, even if I choose not to take clients, which I can take a few once I do finally end things with the paper), which I feel also ties in with that role. And gives me an ability to cover things in this book that I can't otherwise. I also now have time and money to travel a bit to do some workshops on both the warrior path and CR. These things have also been falling into place. Again, with the workshops, when I really didn't expect it to actually come about.

And keeping the land is very close to feasible, although there is some work left to be done to secure that.

This isn't the first time, of course, that I felt things were put in front of me so that I could do something that I was supposed to do. The last time I know of involved that which led to the finding and rescue of my horse. Which I also think is leading somewhere eventually, but that this is all going to play part of it too. There is a tie-in with the land there too. The horse and returning to this land. The horse is a blood-bay with chrome (that is red, black and white), btw. hee!

So I'm sharing here, because She has done something to help me. I am interested in hearing how others' lives have been touched in such ways. How things come before you so that you can complete a task or follow a path.

My apolgies to those who are getting this several times as I have crossposed on Yahoo! on Foireann Mhorrighan as well as on LJ on out_hedge and paganacht to get this to those who are not on all of them. ~;)
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